Serious question about acne scars…insecurity, rejection etc.?
I’m 22 and i’m gay. I’m a pretty good looking guy, no scars on my face or anything, but in high school I had pretty bad acne on my back. I went to the dermatologist and had to go on accutane etc. The active acne has pretty much cleared up but it left some pretty significant scarring. I have this HUGE insecurity about it. I have been to 2 dermatologists and i’m currently treating it, but for the type of scarring its very hard to treat (keloid/hypertrophic). It has improved but I’m told I will have to just live with the scars. I’m afraid that anyone who sees or finds out will reject me for it and its hard to find a great guy as it is. My first b/f said he had no problem with it but I almost always wore a shirt when I was with him unless it was dark and hardly ever let him touch my back. I’m relatively satisfied with every other aspect of my body but this is making life difficult. Am I not trusting that someone won’t be utterly shallow about it? what would u do? Plz be kind!
Tagged with: About • Acne • ETC. • question • rejection • scars...insecurity • Serious
Filed under: Acne Scars Accutane
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well im single are you ready to mingle
You know I had acne as a teen and I know that the stigma can be debilitating. You are lovable and attractive AND worth someone’s unconditional love and affection JUST THE WAY YOU ARE. I hope it doesn’t take you years to figure it out. You’ll be happier the sooner you realize. Plus, we are always ALWAYS harder on ourselves than how other people see us. Anyone that is shallow about it is absolutely not worth spending the rest of your life with.
Ugh, being a gay guy in today’s society can be such a bummer sometimes. I run with the same insecurities – body image wise – even though usually I’ve got no reason to feel this way.
When I was on Accutane myself my skin dried out so quickly that I developed one deep scar on my right cheek. This may not be the case with most acne scars but for me I had a resurfacing done at my dermatologist’s office. Not sure what it was exactly but it involved lasers and some creams. Hah – not much help, right? But it worked for me and the skin kind of just ended up healing itself up and I have the tiniest scar now.
You should do some looking around at your local (and maybe not so local if you can afford it) laser skin care offices. There are some amazing things they can do with scars these days and it seems to be where I see a lot of people turning to. My doctor thankfully was already in that field and could take care of me in his office.
My ex-gf had severe adult cystic acne with the type of scarring you have. It had absolutely NO bearing on who she was as a person, and had NO bearing on how much I loved her. It was not any kind of factor in why we broke up (she’s stilll my best friend). I can honestly say that I only ever noticed she had acne or scarring when she was having a really bad outbreak and I loved her none the less ever, at all.
A decent guy won’t even notice. He’ll see your personality, your inner light shining through, the love and warmth you have in your soul.
I know it’s easy for me to say, and hard for you to do, but try to ignore your scars. If you can not notice them, others won’t see them either.
Best of luck with your life!!!! Decent guys are out there and I hope you find the one you deserve.
DOn’t be insecure about yourself. The person that is going to be with you in a long term relationship is going to love you for who you are. He or she is going to love the person inside you. This body where you live in is not who you are. Whatever scars you have are not going to matter at the time love comes knocking on your door. Keep trying to go on treatment about your scars but remember that you are special and even thoug you have those scars you are a beautiful person. Good luck!
youre like the phantom of the opera
people that like you accept you but you dont accept yourself and you think your not good enough
if they say they like you just be cool